Choose to be attracted to you spouse.

You get to decide if you think your partner is hot? Believe it or not, yes. “Attraction to your spouse is a decision that you have the power to make throughout your marriage,” says Sunny McMillan, certified life coach, radio host, and author of Unhitched. She recommends practicing “attraction thoughts.” To do this, she says, focus on the attributes you’re most drawn to, like your spouse’s great legs or the way they parent your kids (it doesn’t have to be physical). The good news is that your spouse doesn’t have to be a cover model for you to feel attracted. According to Chute, “Happy marriages are based on a sense of connection,” she says. “Physical attraction is far deeper than looks.”